Tell Me Something I Don't Know

It's been interesting as I've gone through this whole cancer crap how some people love to tell me things that they think are a big secret about cancer and treatment.  It's not so much that they are telling me, but the way some folks have of doing it.

I also get lots of advice... some good, some that maybe comes off a little more condescending.
You shouldn't eat any sugar ever again.  It feeds the cancer.
You need to exercise every day and start running so cancer won't come back.
You should only eat organic food.
Someone told me in rather vague terms they could see some things I should be doing just by looking at me. (That one freaked me out a bit... I must totally look like cancer girl?!  And this was before chemo and all that!)  Perhaps some of all of these things are true, and to a certain extent I do believe they are good advice.  I probably should eat less sugar.  So should you.  Everyone should get exercise regularly.  Organic, I believe has many merits.  However, I still have to live my life and enjoy my life, and if I need a delicious chocolate chip cookie or a milkshake I want to have it and enjoy it... and not worry it's going to kill me.

You know, you are going to lose your eyebrows and lashes.
Did you know your all nose hair will fall out?
Did you know you're going to lose ALL your hair... not just on your head... like your legs and you know, down there?  (Not surprisingly, hair loss is probably the most common, or maybe just most memorable, topic.)

Yes, I have heard all those things and more.  I know them because I have friends who have experienced those things personally and are so willing to answer every question I ever asked without hesitation or embarrassment.  Also some of my friends didn't lose all their eyebrows, etc. so that might not happen to me... don't say it like it's a fact.  I've heard about these things because I look at the internet more than necessary.  I peruse discussion boards that are specific to the chemo drugs I am taking and the ladies on those boards have experienced every possible side effect ever to exist (thankfully I personally haven't had most of them, but it has been helpful to me to know what other things could happen).  I also have a great team doctors and chemo nurses, some who have been through this themselves, and they answer all my questions and tell me things to expect and watch out for, too.  So I feel like I'm pretty in the know. I also feel like I have a good handle on what is good information/advice and what is not - especially when it comes to the internet.  It can be a dangerous thing!  I'm really so thankful for all the real-live humans I have in my circle to help educate me.  I'm also thankful for all the people who just check in to say hello and let me know they are thinking of me or comment on this blog without offering any new insight or advice.  That really means a lot to me and helps keep my spirits up!

So it's kind of entertaining when someone calls to tell me these little tidbits of information they have learned, or possibly even had a person they know experience.  I have discovered it's all in the delivery of the message.  I have had various people tell me the same things and sometimes it comes across slightly grating, but in most cases positive, helpful, and encouraging.  I do appreciate all pieces of information from almost all sources, but sometimes it's just comical and sort of comes across in a way like they are trying to scare me.  I don't think you can scare me at this point unless you tell me I have more cancer.

There are actually some things I think I'm more concerned about than all these hair-related issues.  Like the fact I'm probably going to have chemo-induced menopause, which may, or may not be permanent.  Something I thought was a quite a long way off for me.  We are all done having kids so I'm not freaked out about that part, but I kind of liked to think I was still "young" and fertile (even if I only have one fallopian tube).

Along the same topic, I'm not super excited about when I have to start taking Tamoxifen, the drug that blocks estrogen which will help prevent recurrence of my highly estrogen-receptor positive cancer cells (cells that are not in me anymore and are not allowed to come back!).  I am so thankful this drug exists and that it can be an effective treatment for me.  Hopefully I won't have many side effects, but I'm sure there will be some and it will just be an annoying reminder about all this.  I'll take it every day for at least 5 years and probably more like 10 unless I have problems with it.

From what I've heard and read the most common side effects of the drug are similar to menopause... hot flashes, night sweats, decreased libido, dryness, weight gain, etc.  It could be much worse and thankfully none of those things are life-threatening, but they don't sound like much fun, nor are they things I wanted to experience in my 30's and 40's.  Oh, and I might get to have all of those menopausal issues while at the same time still having my period!  I know I just complained about not having my period, but it really seems unfair to have menopause and a period all at the same time.  Especially because I've heard Tamoxifen also can make your period really irregular and heavier then normal... things I've never had to deal with before.  I will research this a little more, but if that is what I have to look forward to, you can sign me up for a uterine ablation right now.